Cloak and dagger...

02/07/2013 22:11

Today when hubby was talking to next door, I rang his friend up and asked if he would ring hubby later this afternoon. The reason for this phone call was so that he could suggest to hubby that either his friend would come over tonight whilst I was at cadets, or that hubby could go to his house whilst I was at cadets.

I've noticed over the past couple of days that hubby has become a little distant for want of a better word. Like yesterday when I was either allowed to go on my girlie afternoon wit my sister only if he came, or I wasn't allowed to go so that I was with him. It's a little like he's not wanting to be on his own (hoover incident) but doesn't want to admit it. So I went all cloak and dagger on him (awful I know) and when his friend rang and suggested the either or, he made it seem like it was hubby's idea and hubby was delighted to come up with the suggestion.

This cloak and dagger m'larky keeps me happy because I'm not worried about what he's getting upto, his friend happy because they can natter about whatever they natter about and hubby happy because he's made the plans and is in control. I do think we're having a little dip at the moment, and if I can make things as subtle as possible so that no-one else notices and keep things smooth for hubby then I'm doing my job right. Thankfully the girls are at my dad's until Sunday and I can be at his beck and call. Like today. I've waited weeks and weeks for new phone screen savers to come for his phone, and they arrived this morning. All six of them. He gave up trying to put them on his phone after screen saver number two. I'd been called in half a dozen times before he gave up, but in the end he asked me to do one. I'm not saying it was a doddle, but it wasn't the Krypton Factor, but the fact he asked me to do it for him was huge because he can manage anything and everything, but things are subtly starting to be passed to me to do and I'm sure that's because he's noticing a difference albeit small. He's asking things like "this is right isn't it?" or saying "I can't manage this my hands are too big and it's too fiddley" and they're all distraction methods for him to not have to do something but there's a reason for him not doing something.

What it's going to be like when the girls get home is going to be a different matter. Today has been calm and he's never shouted, but the house has been calm and silent and he's done what he's wanted when he's wanted to and I can't guarantee that when they're home. This seems to be when the issues arise. He likes to be the centre of attention and I don't mean that in a limelight kind of way. He likes me to be able to drop everything as and when he deems fit and when there are another three in the house I sometimes have to say "wait a minute" and he doesn't like that.

Let's just see if I can keep the rollercoaster in neutral for a little bit longer, because I don't fancy a turn on the Waltzers.


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