I'm lost.

I don't know where to start at the minute. The kitchen debarcle continues and I see no end. Yesterday we went out to visit his mum and dad, and we ended up looking at splashbacks and extractor fans.

Dear God Almighty. We ended up coming out with a wipe board for the wall (instead of tiling it) and a glass splash back and an extractor fan. When we got home, I meticulously worked the measurements out. I wouldn't have minded if I'd twigged there was a plug that was going to be in the way. Bugger. So then we have to get a sparky out to move the plug along. This is fine. So we sit and hum and haa and hum and haa and measure and remeasure and then measure again and then once more before we remeasure.

Give it an hour and a bit and then he decides that he wants to do the wipe board all round the kitchen. Well not all of it, but 46cm from work surface to top of it because that's where the cupboards end. He decides to go under the windowsill and then continue round to where the new bench ends. My heart sank. I'm trying to work out the amount of extra board that we need and no amount of hubby helping was helping, infact it was just making my head hurt. I came out of the kitchen for a coffee and returned. I said that I thought that 46cm all the way round the kitchen would just be too much, looks wise. There's no need for the wipe board to be where we have the tv, but... and here's where my genius hit me. Why don't we continue the depth of underneath the window sill round to where the end of the new bench ends? Why says he. Well. There would be too much of the wipe board colour if we do it this way, and if you do it with the narrow strip it continues the colour around the kitchen without it being in your face and would be consistent, and the bonus would be that we would use a lot less of the board than doing it the other way. Bingo. I left him to ponder it, and today I'll let him think it's his idea, but last night I don't think I could have taken any more.

Two cupboards were taken down last night and one was moved to the other side of the kitchen. One needs to be shortened to fit in the space under the bench, but when putting the mugs and things back into the cupboard I found a mug I forgot I had. On it is photos of the girls. I looked at the mug and just cried. The pictures of the girls are of them all smiling, happy, excited, looking how children should look. It just made me cry because they were taken before any of this nightmare began. It was like being slapped in the face with a wet fish.

I actually left the tea dishes for this morning (they're all done now, and put away lol) but I just had to get out of the room because if I'd stayed in there, he would have and it would have been more numbers that didn't add up, and more numbers in different measurements and I've measured it, and added it up and no amount of it being remeasured will give a different outcome. The tape measure is permanately attached to his hand and we're using it all of the time, and I mean all of the time. I loved that little tape measure. It was in a tool kit that my mam bought me, but I'm starting to loath it. The little click of the measure snapping back into it's housing before being pulled out again to double check the number that we've already checked.

These jobs that we're undertaking, without me realising they're coming, are taking days and days and it's frazzling him. He's tired but won't stop. The numbers don't make sense and the thought that he's going to cut out board just fills me with dread. The board isn't cheap and I can't afford for there to be any mistakes. He says that he wants to sit the plugs into the board. This would mean cutting the plug shape into the board - more measuring, and not tied to be accurate. I said that I thought that if the plugs sit on the board that it would give a better finish look wise. Hmmmm. Another idea he might have this morning. Last night he mentioned that it might be better if he gets someone he knows to come in and do it because they would have it done in less time. I was honest with him. "I think you're right sweetheart. I'm not trying to be cruel, but the numbers are confusing you and if you have to cut things out the pressure of getting it wrong is just going to upset and fry you." I didn't get shouted at. I didn't get any insults. I just got a small smile. His eyes shone. It was as if he was saying thank you for noticing and rubbing my face in it, and for letting him get someone in to do it so that he doesn't have the pressure.

All in all it's been a bit of a rough week, but hopefully when the kitchen is finished (again) we can have a bit of a rest from this DIY m'larky. Even if it is just a week before he starts pulling wallpaper off.